• Curt Mercadante

Show your children love

Many assholes are assholes because they were raised by assholes.


Of course, this is just my theory, but it has seemed to hold up over time, reinforced especially when I coached youth soccer.


Having been raised by a less-than-stellar parent is no excuse to be an asshole, but at least it allows you a bit more empathy when dealing with such people.


But I digress.


During this past year when millions were thrust suddenly into the world of work-and-school-from-home, it's become clear that there are those who see the COVID Era as a curse that forced them to spend more time with their kids, and those who see it as a blessing that enabled them to spend more time with their kids.


Yes, I have empathy for those who were forced into this new situation. My wife and I have been homeschooling for fifteen years, all of which while I've had a home-based business, and we're still figuring it out.


That doesn't take away from the fact that there are some who couldn't wait to get back to the office to "get a break from their kids"...and those who realized how much they were missing their kids by being in the office.


It's nothing new. As homeschoolers, we're used to getting the "joking" comments from other parents.


"I don't know how you do it," they say. "Being around your kids all day!"


Their nervous laughter is usually met with silence.


Back in 2011, the Illinois legislature (where we lived at the time) was considering measures to increase regulations on homeschooling families. My wife and I attended the hearing, during which Sen. Kim Lightford opened the hearing by saying (I'm paraphrasing, but pretty darn close):


"I commend you all. I go to work to get away from my kids."


Her nervous laughter was met with silence by the homeschooling families in attendance, who LOVE being with their kids.


The point of this post isn't to promote homeschooling (though we love it).


It's not to degrade the difficulties "sudden" homeschooling families are feeling in the COVID era.


It's to invite you to learn to love every minute you spend with your children. They need this love. They need it from you, not from a teacher. Not from a coach at the soccer fields or basketball courts. Not just from a video game or smartphone screen.


Your kids need your attention. They need your love.


Kids who grow with this love will learn to love.


And, as I've been posting here on this blog for the past several weeks, learning to live with that love mindset is the key to living a creative life.


It'll be great for your kids. It'll be great for you.


And it'll be great for the future of humanity.


Because, as we've learned during the past year, a humanity that is guided by and makes its decisions in a state of love is so much preferable to a humanity that is guided by and makes its decisions in a state of fear.

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